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1K views 4 replies 5 participants last post by  Phoenix69 
#1 ·
He was staring sadly into his beer and sighed heavily.
"What's up Bob?" asked the bartender…It's not like you to be so down in the mouth."

"It's my five year old son…" the man replied.

"Don't tell me, he's in trouble for fighting in school? - my lad's just the same - forget about it; it happens to boys that age,"

said the bartender, sympathetically.

" I only wish it was that," continued the customer, " but it's far worse than that.
The little devil has got our gorgeous 18 year old next door neighbor pregnant."

"Get away, that's impossible!" gasped the bartender.

"not really," said the man. "The little monster stuck a pin in all my condoms."
 
#3 ·
Teacher: "Four crows are on the fence. The farmer shoots one. How many are left?"

Little Johnny: "None."

Teacher: "Listen carefully: Four crows are on the fence. The farmer shoots one. How many are left?"

Little Johnny: "None."

Teacher: "Can you explain that answer?"

Little Johnny: "One is shot, the others fly away. There are none left."

Teacher: "Well, that isn't the correct answer, but I like the way you think."

Little Johnny: "Teacher, can I ask a question?"

Teacher: "Sure."

Little Johnny: "There are three women in the ice cream parlor. One is licking, one is biting and one is sucking her ice cream cone. Which one is married?"

Teacher: "The one sucking the cone."

Little Johnny: "No. The one with the wedding ring on, but I like the way you think."
 
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